Time is a construct

Small ironies of life:

Being asked out on a date and realising that you only have one night free in the next two weeks. It's suddenly apparent that an extra person will not fit into my life*. A friend once told me that whenever you decide to start something new, you have to think of something else that you're going to give up - after all, technically your day is already full of activities, even if the activity is just sitting on your arse doing nothing. So, right now, nothing to give up, apparently no space for new activities.

Lucky I'm single.

*That is of course, unless they're an heir who might allow me to spend less time on the more tedious parts of life.

housing crisis

Realised today that the amount of money I'm spending repaying debt is the rough equivalent of a mortgage repayment. Only difference being I don't have a house, or any assets.

All I have is the memories. There are some pretty good memories though.

In search of an heir

A downside of enjoying traveling and the finer (read more expensive) things in life is the cost. Since I opened my very first bank account, not counting the dollarmites account that I put $2 per week in, but had no access to, I've been big on spending. You know it's bad when at your 21st instead of starting with stories of stupid drunken antics, or the obligatory "I've known Miss Pomegranate since..." your friends start their speech to the brassy sounds of "Hey Big Spender".

Oscar Wilde once said that anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination. From that rationale, anyone could tell from my credit card statement that I'm clearly gifted in the imagination department. Unfortunately all of this living beyond one's means can only end in one of three ways: death, bankruptcy, or living frugally until the debt is repayed and someone is stupid enough to allow you to clock up a new one. With the options of death and bankruptcy not being particularly appealing, I've opted for debt repayment and am now desperately flinging money into the black hole of debt that I've been very steadily digging since the day I got that very first credit card (to pay for accommodation that I conveniently forgot I would have to pay for when I booked the $1 virgin flights to get me there and back). I'm hoping that if I throw it fervourently enough I might actually plug the hole at the bottom, much like the drains in my house when you turn the tap on fast enough and the sink fills up with water.*

In the meantime, I've come up with another potential out. All I need to do is marry an heir and become an heiress. So if anyone knows of an heir looking for his heiress, please pass on my contacts. I'd do a much better job than Paris, I'm far classier, and I have a whole lot more imagination.

*fast enough being slightly faster than a trickle.

On the subject of wank

One of the things I really don't like is wank, and there seems to be a lot of it going around. It's always very thinly disguised as some kind of lifestyle choice, and often espoused by those who think that they are living an Alternative Lifestyle*.

The one that seems to be thrown around by so many of my peers is that of going to another country to Find Yourself. Young wankers, the country over seem to think that through some miraculous transformation, jetting off to the other side of the world is going to help them in their quest towards meaning in their otherwise consumer driven lives. The part of themselves that makes them Unique is out there just waiting to be stumbled over, but not locally, no, it's so Unique that they have to go to another country** to find it. Now I've been to other countries, and one thing I've noticed it that being thrown into an unfamiliar situation often makes it difficult just to find the local supermarket, let alone that very special piece of yourself that makes you Unique. Seriously, if you can't find yourself in a city you know, how on earth are you going to manage in one where you can't speak the language and need a map to navigate?!

The other wank I hate is this whole idea of Who You Are being an excuse for completely crappy behaviour and character flaws. "I'm a Taurus, so I'm supposed to be stubborn", or "I'm an Aires, so I'm selfish" are not excuses for being a dickhead. After all, while you may have been born into a particular star sign, you've had since birth to work on these things. By all means, if you enjoy your character flaws then continue to promote them, but at least take responsibility. Rephrase: "I only think about myself, and I don't really want to think about other people, so that makes me selfish" or "I don't want to think about things from another perspective, and I enjoy ignorantly sticking to my original thought or idea no matter what evidence to the contrary is presented, which is why I'm stubborn".

Of course, if you're a real Wanker, then you can top it off with a combo. The Who You Are wank can also very closely follow the Finding Yourself in another country wank, because of course once you've found what makes you Unique (by working in a bar in London for a year before you go back home to university), then you know very well Who You Are, and of course all of the associated character flaws that go along with it.

* The irony here is that it's not really very alternative when so many people are doing it now is it?

**remarkably this is most likely the same other country that everyone else who is Unique goes to, usually it's in Europe with a high probability of being somewhere in the UK

Did I mention I like to travel?

Walking along Lake Street I thought to myself "I should have worn shoes", then quickly dismissed the thought as frivilous. Thongs (or flip flops) were perfectly acceptable attire, despite it being the middle of winter.

One more thing that I like starting with C; Cairns.

I had my first corndog (and most likely my last) in San Francisco. It was a very perplexing experience, my mouth didn't quite know whether it was supposed to be sweet or savoury. It left me feeling, well, confused.

I find Queensland much the same. The weather is amazing, the environment is stunning, but the people, oh the people. It always feels like I'm stepping into a giant theme park when I go there. Everything man made seems to be tackily oversized, over coloured and generally a bit off.

I think in the end, the weather in Cairns and the Great Barrier Reef on the doorstep won out over the people and it ended up on the positive side of the scale. After all there aren't really that many people living there.

And I thought Melbourne was cold

First thought as I step out of Canberra airport today - "I should have brought gloves". It was a balmy -1 degrees outside. -1?!

On return to Melbourne, with the angst cloud that is Canberra still hanging over my head, I've come to the sad conclusion that I'll probably die of some kind of lifestyle illness. I participate in far too many of the things that are bad for you to actually be able to get away with it. It's either that or I'll die in jail after going on a mad rampage, hunting down and killing people who misuse "your" and "you're", or use apostrophes pluratively, rather than in the contractive or possessive forms.

Actually that's probably not true, I'm not really the violent type, bad grammar just irritates me on a level with those last few grains of sand that seem to find their way in your bed after a day at the beach. You know the ones, the ones that no matter how hard you try to brush them out they always gravitate right back towards the spot you're lying in.*

Oh and I discovered one thing starting with C that I don't like - Canberra.

*that said, I'm fairly certain there will be at least one, if not many, instances of bad grammar in this blog. Feel free to point them out.

Brought to you by the letter 'C'

As I walked across the road in the general direction of Brunswick St the first thought I had was that I should have worn tights. It's Melbourne. It's cold. Fuck, that conclusion shouldn't have been too hard to draw, even with the heater on in my room. Thankfully since I moved here my sensitivity to temperature has reduced remarkably.

First post should be an introduction, right?

Here's some interesting or not interesting things about me:

I like science. I like art. I don't think the two are that different. I appreciate politcs. I have a love-hate relationship with computer code. I work from home a lot because I can't be bothered going to the office. Also they don't let me smoke and drink at my desk. My desk at home currently houses these things:

computer, nail scissors, half a bottle of shiraz, half a glass of shiraz, half a packet of cigarettes, an ash tray, a coffee mug, empty bowl and plate, printer, hand cream, lighter, earrings, rings, tweezers, camera, tin mug from alcatraz, half a glass of water, papers, dvd, lamp, unpaid parking fines, frequent flyer card, credit card, hard drive, bepanthen, blank cds, spray bottle, phone, sunglasses and a lamp. Hell, I could survive for a week with this stuff.

Until a week ago I didn't own a pair of jeans that fit. I wear skirts a lot. I enjoy starting things, I'm not very good at finishing them. 140 characters isn't enough space for me to voice my opinion.

I was once told by an old Jewish fashionista come petroleum broker who I met in an airport that I looked like the kind of girl who wears exactly what she likes all the time. I tend to agree.

I like the rollercoaster, and would always chose it over the ferris wheel, even if it makes you sick sometimes. I belive sleep is for the weak, and sometimes for the week, but never for the weekend. I'm very good at procrastinating.

I like most things starting with the letter 'C', and some things that don't

Oh, and now I have a blog. It's called "I should have worn tights". If it could have a by-line it would be "growing up in Melbourne at 28".